How Do You Know? Taking Steps to Start Counseling

Written by: Courtney Kershaw   Are you a person? Great! Then counseling could be for you. I know it’s not quite that simple, but the essence is true. One common experience is that people start looking for counseling support when they are in crisis. It’s urgent, it can be chaotic, and if you can’t find someone quickly it can be overwhelming. The truth is that you don’t need to be in crisis to get support. Many people, couples, families, and individuals alike all find benefits in having routine check-ins with someone who is there to just support life along the way. It [...]

By |2021-07-06T14:29:06+00:00July 6th, 2021|Individual Therapy|

Slowing Down When Things Speed Up

Written by: Courtney Kershaw   We all know that life comes with it’s ups and downs. Sometimes we are in a busy go-go-go season, sometimes we’re in a bit of a lull. It can naturally be easier to find time for self-care and focusing on your mental health when the pace is slower and you have more opportunity, but how do we re-prioritize taking time for self-care and mental health when life speeds up again? As the world starts regaining it’s pace, it can be important to explore means of making space for mental health needs. Why should you make time for [...]

By |2021-06-04T15:58:56+00:00June 4th, 2021|Individual Therapy|

Self-Resourcing: You’ve Got This

Written by: Courtney Kershaw   Whether you tend to identify more as an introvert or as an extrovert, it’s part of the human experience to navigate some level of balance between relying on others and relying on yourself. Some people have learned to depend on themselves first and only ask for help or support in times of dire need, others have a different level of comfort seeking support from others for any number of needs. While reaching out to your network in a time of need is something that I highly recommend (it’s kind of my thing as a therapist), it’s also [...]

By |2021-05-06T11:38:35+00:00May 6th, 2021|Individual Therapy|

Saying Yes

Written by: Courtney Kershaw   When you are standing on the precipice of a new experience, you are standing at the point where every possibility exists. Sometimes the possibilities are exciting, sometimes they are terrifying, and sometimes they are a bit of both. But, that moment when you are getting ready to step into the unknow can be an amazing place to check in with yourself and decide how you want to take that step. How often do you notice yourself saying “no” to new experiences out of fear? Fear that you do not know what to expect in the experience, or [...]

By |2021-04-09T11:57:21+00:00April 6th, 2021|Individual Therapy|

Parenting in a Pandemic: Am I Doing This Right?

Written by: Courtney Kershaw   Being a parent has been described in numerous ways as both challenging and rewarding, grueling and joyous, heartbreaking, and full of love. Many parents wonder if they are “doing it right”, if they are giving their children what they need, if they should be doing more, or less, or completely different things than they are doing now. The list of ways to be a “good” parent could be endless. Entire sections of bookstores are dedicated to experts claiming guidance for how to achieve this ever-elusive goal of “good” parenting. But what on earth are the rules for [...]

By |2021-04-09T11:54:33+00:00March 23rd, 2021|Family Therapy|

Baby Talk: Communicating with Your Partner in Pregnancy

Written by: Courtney Kershaw.   Communication with your partner is a staple of a relationship. Learning how to enhance and expand communication during life stage changes is an extension of that skill that any couple can utilize. If you already have a foundation of being able to identify and express your needs with your partner, then the next steps is integrating some room for the unpredictable or unplanned parts that come up in a relationship during pregnancy. So what changes in communication with your partner when you’re experiencing life stage changes? New Topics for New Stages Needs: Identify core needs. Both [...]

By |2021-04-09T12:29:15+00:00March 23rd, 2021|Couples Counseling|

Emotion-focused therapy (EFT) – Healing Wounds and Bringing Out The Best in Each Other

Written by: Melissa Pilarski.     Couples start therapy for a variety of reasons. “Improving communication” is most often a target couples want to work towards in therapy. I often hear partners describe feeling unsupported, unheard, or like their partner doesn’t “get them” anymore. So much emotional pain can stem from miscommunication. If left unaddressed, it can grow worse and bleed into other areas of your life. It can feel like walking into a brick wall after several failed attempts to communicate emotional pain with a partner. I’ve heard partners describe the sinking feeling time and time again, when they walk [...]

By |2021-04-09T12:27:54+00:00March 17th, 2021|Couples Counseling|

Gas Lighting or Misunderstanding- How to Tell the Difference

Written by: Melissa Pilarski.     What is Gaslighting? Gaslighting is a term coined by the field of psychology to describe a style of manipulation. The term was coined after the 1944 movie “Gaslight,” wherein the husband convinces his wife she is crazy and losing her mind. Gas lighting can exist in a variety of relationships; parent-child, romantic, co-workers, and even between leaders and nations. Essentially, gas lighting is when one person is successful in getting the victim to question their reality, often resulting in an unhealthy relationship dynamic. How Can I Tell if I’m Experiencing Gaslighting or Genuine Misunderstanding? There [...]

By |2021-04-09T12:26:57+00:00March 3rd, 2021|Family Therapy|

Intimacy In All Its Forms

Written by: Courtney Kershaw.   The word “intimacy” can easily conjure images like a montage of scenes from a romantic comedy. A couple laughing and embracing, seeming so in love without a care in the world and everything they do has a soft glow of romance. But so rarely does real life mirror this idealized version of intimacy. Sure, occasionally big romantic experience happen and they can feel very intimate and connective, but what about all the time in between? How do relationships foster intimacy between the blockbuster moments? Let’s look at the components of what intimacy is. In one form, [...]

By |2021-04-09T12:24:25+00:00February 24th, 2021|Couples Counseling|

Being Open to Vulnerability and Opportunities for Growth in a Relationship

Written by: Melissa Pilarski.     Vulnerability is allowing others to see you for ALL of who you are-- including your shame. We’re talking about the parts of yourself that you don’t even want to acknowledge exist. It hurts too much. There is a real fear that if you share your shame story with someone, they will no longer accept you for all of what makes you who you are. That fear is often big enough to hold us back from sharing. This fear of not being accepted by others makes complete sense, especially when you take attachment theory into consideration. [...]

By |2021-04-09T12:23:07+00:00February 19th, 2021|Couples Counseling|
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