Premarital Therapy
Are You Preparing For A Healthy Future Together?
Are you and your partner about to get engaged or married and want to ensure the security of your future together? Are you looking for a way to strengthen your relationship’s foundation while heading off any complications down the road? Do you have any concerns about cultural, religious, or compatibility issues that may eventually create conflict?
Perhaps you’ve been married before and want to make sure that any negative behaviors or tendencies from past relationships don’t resurface in your current one. Or maybe you are integrating two families into one and are looking for guidance as you prepare to raise your children in a new environment. Conversely, one of you may reject the institution of marriage or hold different expectations for having children and you don’t know how to reach a compromise.
For some couples, premarital therapy is a way of addressing small issues that have already become a concern so they don’t grow into something larger. For instance, you may be looking to manage sensitive differences in your families’ finances, values, or backgrounds so they do not become an issue of contention later. Or you may be dealing with communication or intimacy issues that you don’t know how to address on your own. Similarly, you may each have different expectations for raising children and building a family that are creating tension and uncertainty.
As you look forward to your lives together, you can reinforce the connection you have with each other and learn how to navigate and overcome possible challenges in the future. With our help, you will be assured that you have both done everything you can to ensure a long, loving life together.
All Couples Could Benefit From Guidance
It’s important for you to know that investing in counseling does not mean that there’s something wrong with your partnership. No relationship is perfect and the task of balancing the unique qualities of two individuals can naturally create conflict and uncertainty. And although some conflict can be healthy and seized upon as an opportunity for growth, as individuals, we are not born with the ability to always resolve matters peacefully and productively. This can be especially true when managing the aspects of combining families or having children.
It’s challenging for us, as humans, to step outside of ourselves and see our actions and hear our words from another’s perspective. All too often we become so focused on our own perspective that it’s impossible to see the pain or point of view of our partners. As a result, it can be difficult to self-advocate or even have important conversations without feeling personally attacked or wounded.
Our goal is to help you understand that your relationship will naturally encounter challenges and disruptions that you have the power to overcome. Therefore, if you have any concerns about the well-being of your relationship, we can help you prepare for a secure and healthy marriage.
Premarital Therapy Can Strengthen Your Foundation
One way to encourage a strong marriage life is to prevent problems before they happen. Our role is to help you prepare for common issues found in marriage, such as sex, finances, religion, children, and in-laws. Working with a therapist can help you identify inherent strengths in your relationship and give you a deeper understanding of yourselves as individuals. It allows you to develop valuable communication skills that enable you to have a deeper, authentic connection with your partner.
In a warm and neutral environment, we’ll begin by helping you better understand the nature of your relationship and how each one of you contributes to its dynamic. For instance, we may look at how you were raised, your past relationships, or powerful events that influenced the way you think or react. We’ll help you understand how all of these elements combine to create the person you are and how you interact in your relationship. Building this understanding can help you work through small problems, reconcile issues you’ve had in the past, or anticipate unique problems that may arise in the future. Ultimately, our goal is to set your marriage off on the right foot so that you have the best possible chances for happiness and peace together.
At the Colorado Center for Couples And Families, we believe that happiness directly relates to the health of relationships. We have therapists trained in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), which focuses in on your emotional connection and reveals ways for overcoming obstacles to communication and empathy. At times, we may walk through hypothetical scenarios of a potential future problem so that partners can learn to respond to new stressors without turning to old behaviors.
Our approach to premarital counseling involves guided conversations through which you can explore one another’s values and gently address previously undisclosed topics and feelings. Perhaps we’ll break down some defense mechanisms, which can deepen your connection to and trust for one another. And, because we are future-focused, we consider ourselves a resource that you can return to should conflict arise later on. (Some couples attend semi-regular check-ins to make sure everything is going smoothly.)
Deciding to make a lifetime commitment is a major, life-changing event. It can be exhilarating and scary and surreal. It is possible to enter this new juncture in life confidently and to build your partnership on the strongest possible foundation, as both individuals and partners. With our help, you can transition gracefully and lovingly into your new roles, feeling safe and prepared to take on anything together.
You may have doubts about attending counseling…
Do we really need premarital therapy?
Therapy is an act of preventative maintenance that enables you to take care of relationship problems before they begin. So many couples start out not knowing what makes them happy, who they are as individuals, or what their expectations are for marriage. Clarifying these issues and learning how to empathize through authentic communication can improve the health of your marriage before you even get to the altar.
Therapy is just going to stir up trouble.
We cannot stress enough that therapy does not invent problems; it exposes and repairs them. The issues that may arise in our sessions would likely have come up later under the involuntary pressures of life. In fact, most married couples wait years before they seek help for their issues, often letting situations develop into crisis. By exploring minor issues or behaviors now before they become too deeply ingrained, you are ensuring the health of your relationship years to come.
Why should we spend our money on premarital counseling, especially if there aren’t any issues right now?
We view this kind of therapy as an investment in your long-term happiness and overall well-being. Think of it as a form of preventative maintenance that keeps your marriage running smoothly even if you run into some bumps further down the road. Your relationship—your future family—is worth so much more than the limited amount of time and money spent ensuring the health of your marriage. We encourage you to come see us—if only for a short time. That might be all it takes. And in that case, if you want to keep us in mind for the future, you’ll know where to find us.
Let Us Help You Prepare For The Future
You don’t have to make this leap without help! For more information please call us for a free phone consultation at 303-682-6900, or send us a message here. You can also click here to schedule a session with one of our therapists.